…..Yeah. I feel I don’t need to expand too much on how blessed I feel, waking up next to this stud every morning.
Since we’ve been married, he has been promoted and promoted and promoted some more times. It has been amazing to watch him be recognized for all his hard work and his talent. And I am so incredibly thankful that I’m able to stay home to raise our kids if I choose to do so. However, his fast paced career has presented us with an opportunity to figure out a few ways to make our marriage still rock with limited time.
Here are a few things that have made a big impact:
1. Reading the 5 love languages together…. well I read it, and he has listened to it on audiobook a bunch of times in the car. This helped us clarify what we both required for a happy marriage, so we can zero-in on those needs.
2. Make an effort to be involved in each other’s lives. I make sure I know what is going on for him at work, and support him whether he’s doing awesome, or struggling. Remember when those important meetings are, and ask about them. If he’s up for company, and doing handy chores around the house, offer to give him a hand, or work along side him, instead of checking facebook….again.
3. If it’s been a rough week, try to give him some grace in the evenings and weekends. I can’t remember where my mom got it from, but she always used to say that men need time to “watch the fire”. So if he seems like he needs to lie on the couch and stare at the ceiling for a while, maybe don’t nag over and over about the lawn that needs mowing.
4. Try to limit the amount of e mails sent during the work day. Although, it is great to be available for him, his inbox is constantly full, and it is a battle for him to keep up, so I don’t need to send him hourly updates. Also, I try to figure the household things out on my own as much as I can… because as far as I can remember, he’s never asked me to handle a business meeting for him! (…smart guy)
5. Give him an opportunity to be the dad when he’s available. When he’s had a crazy couple of weeks, then wants to take the kids out for an afternoon, let him. This seems like a no-brainer, but when mom’s been completely in charge for a while, it is REALLY hard for (this) mom not to point out all the mistakes that I feel are being made. I try to keep in mind, that I’ve figured out tricks with time, and dad will figure things out too as long as I let him… but don’t set him up for a real problem if it’s something you can help with, like he’s about to head out without diapers, just help him pack the bag. It’s also important to keep that pride in check… no matter how much more I’ve done something, does not mean his idea is not valid…. maybe dad’s idea is exactly the “outside the box” idea I need.
6. Remember, would you rather be at home loving on your kids, or running his crazy stressful business meetings?? Count your blessings…. and throw your expectations out the window, they do nothing to help a marriage.
Boy these are good things to remind myself about too….